1. My whole head shaved except for a chunk
Of radiant bangs hanging down in the front.
In the first few weeks, I blamed my sister,
Like she started cutting and I couldn’t resist her.
After months of self-maintenance I was forced
To admit I was the concept’s original source.
Nothing before or since has captured the essence
Of my protracted adolescence.

Chorus: I see the gears turning behind the smile.
I can tell you’ve got designs on my lifestyle.
Don’t feel sly like I’m not aware what
You’ve got planned for me and my haircut. (x2)

2. Fueled by junk. Driven by debt.
I’m gonna sort it all out but it isn’t quite time yet.
Wear my loan millstone just like a necklace.
Walk-on cameo: The Young-ish and the Restless.
Some wanna grow, some just wanna play house.
Show just a glimpse of indecision and they pounce.
It’s still a point pride that I’m not too hasty.
Maybe ’cause I let the forelock inoculate me.
I know it looks bad, I know it seems shabby.
Frozen pizzas and frozen beef patties.
I guess I never learned not to cringe at direction.
This is not rebellion, it’s conscientious objection.
With some luck if I get left to my devices,
I can segue straight into a mid-life crisis.
Tired of the diatribe and bored of your squawking.
You’d drive a guy to some more forelocking.

Chorus: I see the gears turning behind the smile.
I can tell you’ve got designs on my lifestyle.
Don’t feel sly like I’m not aware what
You’ve got planned for me and my haircut. (x2)

3. With a decision like this, there will always be some toll.
Forelocks make you appear to be a numbskull.
Moron camouflage, not intended
For those who know better to struggle to compliment it.
Some’ll think you gotta be a child to choose it,
To wear it everywhere out of mild amusement.
Wrote a song about kissing, haven’t done any kissing since.
Ladies know I’m never gonna turn into the missing prince.
I let it grow out for a year and a half.
People quit caring, I stopped hearing the laughs.
I finally decided that the joke had landed.
And even if it hadn’t, it was time it was abandoned.
So I clipped it off and the last time I saw it
It was sitting in a Ziploc bag in my closet.
But you never know, I might grow it again.
You’ll see me walk past, forelock blowing in the wind.

Chorus: I see the gears turning behind the smile.
I can tell you’ve got designs on my lifestyle.
Don’t feel sly like I’m not aware what
You’ve got planned for me and my haircut. (x2)