Chorus x2: Do the Flap! Flap! Hiss!
How do you do it?
You do it like this!
Like how?
Like this!
Like how?
Like that!
Like how?
(You can do it like a Free-Tailed Bat! / You can do it like a Mouse-Tailed Bat!)

1. Like a bat outta Hell-on-wheels-within-wheels
Safe and secure: you don’t really feel like a meal.
But you look up in the sky, it’s a bird, it’s a jet plane.
A bat’s fangs flash while you stand with your neck craned.
Flap! Flap! Hiss! Quick, with no delay.
If you Flutter! Flutter! Squeak! You’re seen as weak prey.
Decay only if you’re certain that you’re dead.
Dreamt this song with bats circling my bed.
Do not even make me address the V-word.
Bats stay bats, no Eurotrash features.
Flap! Flap! Pause. What caused the Bat’s Glee?
An Avian Bridle, it turns a bird into a taxi.
Ask me once and I’ll tell you bluntly:
The Flap! Flap! Hiss! Will consume the country.
Sedentary folks sucked dry: bats did this!
Back to the cave with two Flaps! And a Hiss!

Chorus x2: Do the Flap! Flap! Hiss!
How do you do it?
You do it like this!
Like how?
Like this!
Like how?
Like that!
Like how?
(You can do it like a Sac-Winged Bat! / You can do it like a Disk-Winged Bat!)

2. You get jumpy just knowing there might be a bat around.
Feel a shiver up your spine when you hear a flapping sound.
It’s a Nightmare on Bat Wings, things might get strange.
Tap into a jugular vein with nine inch fangs.
Two parallel lines in the sand to the crash site.
There’s a chance you won’t recover from that bite.
Hanging from the ceiling of the cave with stalagtites.
Flap! Flap! Hiss! When they’re spotted with the flashlight.
Look no further if you’re like, “Where’s the moths go?”
Echolocated, devoured, now they’re all guano.
Got no vaccines, a rabid bat kills.
When a mammal takes flight then the World gets chills.
Let’s talk style, skipping feathery for leathery.
It’s better, see? Even the tiny bats look threatening.
Fur! Wings! Fangs! Eyes Glow! So classy.
The Flap! Flap! Hiss! Makes the girls go batty.

Chorus x2: Do the Flap! Flap! Hiss!
How do you do it?
You do it like this!
Like how?
Like this!
Like how?
Like that!
Like how?
(You can do it like a Sucker-Footed Bat! / You can do it like a Funnel-Winged Bat!)

Bridge: Let’s fly!
You can do it like a Harpy Fruit Bat, like a Philippine Dawn Bat!
You can do it like a Soot-Mustached Bat, you can do it like a Hairy-Legged Vampire Bat!
You can do it like a Dagger-Toothed Flower Bat, like a Ghost Bat, like a Little Bent-Winged Bat!
You can do it like Gould’s Wattled Bat!
Like a..
Little-Collared, White-Collared, Yellow-Bellied, Yellow-Lipped, Black-Eared, Black-Bellied, Bristle-Faced, Ashy-Headed, Flute-Nosed, Hog-Nosed, Bare-Rumped, Bare-Backed, Golden-Capped, Golden Tipped, Little-Pied Bat!

3. Blind as a bat but we know where your throats are.
Listen very close, head-bob to the sonar.
Flown far and wide, wanna Hiss! and collapse.
Always precede that Hiss! with two Flaps!
Bats spread plagues, this craze is infectious.
The nervous and squeamish and jittery detest this.
Get this straight: it is not unhealthy
To go through life with bats in your belfry.
Under bridges, in a castle, in your attic,
Silhouette against the moon just to be a bit dramatic.
Wreaking havoc on the superstitious. I dare you
To not freak out with a bat caught in your hairdo.
Flap! Then what? Flap! Then what? You know this.
Bare your teeth and emit a low Hiss!
A billion bats, nightfall, join the swarm!
And Flap! Flap! Hiss! on the wings of the storm!

Chorus x2: Do the Flap! Flap! Hiss!
How do you do it?
You do it like this!
Like how?
Like this!
Like how?
Like that!
Like how?
(You can do it like a Fisherman Bat! / You can do it like a Hollow-Faced Bat!)

Outro x4: I move in darkness.
Turn the lights down, I’m ready to go.
Let the night come, I’m ready to go.